My backyard grave or how I died for 3 hours

If you die right now, what is number one thing you will regret not having done in your life? I bet even when I ask you this question, you don’t know the answer for sure. It is because the real answer is hidden in your subconscious, and thanatotherapy can supposedly help you discover it. “Thanatos” means death in Greek. It is therapy by death.

As soon as I heard about it, I knew it was for me. I like extreme and exciting kinds of activities, probably more because of the intense hormones of happiness they give me than the therapeutic affect itself.

And so I decided to try it. Continue reading “My backyard grave or how I died for 3 hours”

New Year Resolutions

If you don’t know where you are going, where will you arrive? Every morning, remind yourself what is the general direction of your life.

People tend to think about this a lot in December. January is considered a month of new beginnings, many making New Year resolutions, and 90% of people not sticking to them by the end of January.

In this article I will share my practice of making new year resolutions and some tips on how to make sure they come true for you. Continue reading “New Year Resolutions”

My little lives of 2018

Every time I come to a new place, things feel different as if I travelled into a new world. At New Year’s I honour this space travel by time traveling back to it and saying my words of gratitude.

2018 was very different from two previous years. This time I stayed mostly in one place, Ukraine, but everything inside me transformed so much I don’t always recognize myself anymore. I want to share my little lives of 2018 with you.

January

We started the year in Swargashram in Rishikesh. Angie and I meditated through midnight in our room and fell asleep. This was a powerful kickstart to everything that happened next. On January 1, I broke my phone screen and we dipped in the Ganga. Every day after yoga practice we would sit by the ganga drinking smoothies and hanging out with cows. I was obsessed with Thich Nhat Hanh and wanted to buy all of his books, and then I met someone from France who was his student for 20 years!

We met sunrise in the mountains with friends from all over the world and had an early morning party dancing and laughing. This may have been the best morning of my life.

I came back to cold Ukraine for my man’s birthday. I love him.

February

Every morning I woke up to go outside and have two little cuddly fluff balls waving their tales to me. Veronika came to visit us all the way from Zambia! Thai people say that giving something first thing in the morning creates positive energy for the whole day. I started my mornings feeding the dogs and having coffee with Andrii. Mornings would last till noon. Mornings are for observing and relaxing.

In February I went to Kiev for a journalism school and walked in this park every day enjoying snow. Snow was something new to me again, after many winters abroad.

March

My first neuro linguistic programming (NLP) practice course and I realized I had no idea what I wanted. It was scary. I also started teaching self development to kids at the village school. We ended up doing yoga, going to the cave and having a lot of fun!

April

My mom and I went to Poland for our birthday trip. It was my first time in Krakow, and I loved it. My mom is so happy when she travels, I want to send her on around the world trip for a year =)

For my 30th birthday I did a one-week Satori retreat with Kyiv Osho center. Here are my insights. Everything that happens to us is inside our cell memory. I learnt that I choose what to feel in the moment from a huge flow of what comes to me. It’s like we exist in some reality that we co-create. I practiced many Osho dynamic meditations and relived my grief pneumonia. It was very tough, but very much worth it.

May

After Satori retreat I was senseless. I was hungry, but nothing tasted well expect for baby food. I was a bit frozen. Claudi came to visit, and I remember our long walk and my feet touching the earth in a wide open field.

In May we moved to our new home! I was like “Is this real?” You can see before and after below.

In May I learnt that pushing myself will never do me any good, but deplete my willpower.

June

Andrii and I went to Yoga fest where I taught Thai massage and meditation. I was honest enough to admit I did not like yoga fests. Sometimes we lie to ourselves so much that truth sounds weird. Don’t be afraid to admit your truth. It is yours, it belongs to you. You will sigh with ease once you tell yourself everything, honestly.

In June I received Koronatsiya slova 2019 literary award! My novel, Adventures of Frenchman in Ukraine was one of the 10 finalists. This is the cover, and the publication is in progress as of today.

July

We bought a car! Shopping became so much easier, very very grateful and will learn how to drive soon, I promise =) I grew huge zucchinis in my garden, because I forgot to pick them every day. I started a 3 month long journey to recover my creativity with Artist Way by Julia Cameron. If you have never done it, do it! I learnt so much about myself, most importantly that I am the creator of my own life.

We organised Into the quiet, a meditation retreat in Carpathian mountains with beautiful people.

August

It was my first month after I quit my job. I could not let go of the feeling that I have to run somewhere and do something. We watched a lot of Games of thrones. I finished my Shine, a self development novel about inner and outer journey. I started @redlipstickpoems on Instagram, recoding my poems and the ones I like.

September

This month gave us our puppy Kotik! I started NLP Master course, which once again turned my life upside down. I completed the 3 month Artist Way journey by Julia Cameron and lost my morning pages notebook on the train the next day )

October

Dani and I organized Wake up happy challenge month. We woke up singing for the first week, dancing for the second week and laughing for the third week. I learnt that mornings could be happy.

November

I exercised and poured cold water buckets on myself every single day. I learnt that cold was not scary. I wrote a book about sex and traveling during NaNoWriMo. I am giving it some rest before editing it.

December

I taught meditation and mindfulness at Conflict: an opportunity for learning in Berlin. I remembered how much I love people, teaching and traveling.

I went back to NLP and did a powerful technique which helped me understand what was the meaning of my life. Or at least take a sneak peak. Now I know. Doing this and celebrating new year at home with the man I love and the puppy I love was the best celebration, even if we overslept a bit.

How many lives did you live in 2018 and which one was your favourite? Let me know in the comment below!

Read here about my 2019 New Year resolutions and how to set them to make sure they come true.